Friday, July 15, 2011

A bond like no other

When I had Jackson, I knew that I wanted to breastfeed this time, since I was cheated with my first son (no support in hospital, nurses never came, being young and not knowing about lactation consultsnts, ect) we got three good weeks and that was it.

Well once Jackson was out they had to take him to the nicu right away since I was being induced due to his heart skipping beats and they needed to be sure that it was going to go back to normal once out of the womb. So I didn't get to nurse right away. I was worried that it would affect the breastfeeding. It didnt, thank goodness. He was a great latcher and a lactation consultant was right there helping me.

That first week was hard and I almost gave up. The pain was just horrible and cracked/bleeding nipples did not make it any better. I am glad I pushed on. If I wouldnt have, I would have never known the bond that we have made. It is truely something so special. The way he depends on me and looks at me and even the way he smiles when he sees me is just so fulfilling.
When he is eating and just stops to smile at me or when he is sleepy and places his hand on my chest as he cloeses his eyes let's me know how special our time is. I know once we start solids it will not be as often and I know that one day it will be over but I am enjoying this time now. I just wish I could have had this Jeremy too. (We have a great bond too but in a different way...he is a daddys boy...enough said lol)